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I pause and she is still there, the picture of her beautifully painted on the canvas
of my thoughts.
The woman I want to become.
She is smart, beautiful, accomplished and living her best life.
She is content and wealthy and her wealth is not defined by the figures in her
bank account.
Her wealth is her family and those handpicked for her inner-circle.
Her wealth is her knowledge gained and wisdom applied.
Her wealth is the mistakes she made and the evaluated lessons she learned from
them.
Her wealth is her ability to love, discern and sacrifice.
Her wealth is her dignity, her purpose and strength of character.
Her wealth is her drive to realize her potential and possibilities.
Her wealth is the power she will gain from realizing and being all that she was
created to be.
There are days when this picture is erased and the canvas is broken by self-
defacing thoughts that mar the soul and disquiets the spirit.

I am not good enough! I am not pretty enough!

I don’t have her figure! My hair texture is bad!

I am not going to survive this! They will never like me!

I will never be accepted for who I am and what I choose to do!

I will never experience true love!

The thoughts rage, viciously attacking my peace of mind and sense of knowing
who I am and my purpose.

But then I pause, and the canvas returns, and in that moment I am no longer afraid, no longer defeated,

no longer perturbed, no longer disturbed yet I affirm the woman;

the woman I am becoming.

I stand in awe beholding the beauty,

appreciating the strokes,

the colours,

the lines,

the contours

all skilfully combined to create a masterpiece.

And that masterpiece is the woman I am.

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